Ashake’s Diary 9 – Happy Ending?

Ashake's diary

Hello Diary, (Kinda weird that I’ve never felt the need to say hi to you)

So today was awkward, and something unexpected happened (sad face). I am not one to believe in miracles because if miracles were real Toks would have vanished from earth 6 years ago when she decided to cut off some of my hair because her doll needed hair nappy hair extensions.

Anyway, we had a test today in class, which I aced (adjusts nerd glasses) and Ify wasn’t present for the test, weird! My mind was probably playing tricks on me because I could swear that I saw Ify this morning. I kept thinking to myself that Ify surely is smarter than this, she knows how much trouble she could get into for skipping class. Then it occurred to me that this could probably be the universe telling me to find her and snitch my discovery to the principal, interesting!

During my search, I bumped into Simi on my way to the bathroom and I literally almost jumped out of my skin, Simi might have forgiven me but she hadn’t forgotten so I always tried to keep myself out of her way. However, instead of the utter disgust, Simi would usually bless me with, she simply pushed past me.

I got to the bathroom and it was deathly quiet, so I figured I could freshen up right before I continued my search.  I’m a typical scaredy cat, but this was my school so I figured I was safe. As I bent to splash some water on my face I heard a tiny squeak, I felt a presence behind me.  I turned in fear, at that moment I was ready to scream my lungs out, then I saw that it was Ify standing behind me looking like a soaked sponge.

It was obvious that she had been crying, about what? I couldn’t believe it. I had to be the worst person to find her like this, I tried to be happy but that emotion was on vacation. “What’s wrong ?” Ify didn’t say anything she just kept crying and at some point, I had to hug her, it was so uncomfortable, why me? Instead of putting her in this situation, here I was comforting her, shame on me!

Apparently, Ify just lost her mum and had to go live with her dad, she had asked Simi earlier if she could move in with her, but Simi declined, on the grounds that her parents wouldn’t allow it. To be honest, I didn’t care much for Ify, I was upset with myself for being the unfortunate person that happened to be in this unfortunate bathroom during this unfortunate crisis.

Anyway, I tried to calm her down and get her to the school counselor’s office for some advise, and maybe help, I wasn’t even going to suggest she move in with me. We got to the counselor’s office and I left Ify there and went back to class. A few hours later school closed and I put the incident behind me and also tried not to mention it to anyone. I didn’t want anyone talking me into showing compassion (which I have always considered a disease by the way).

I got home after hanging at my friend’s place for a few hours and saw bags in the hallway, I knew my Aunt Bola was coming over, but the boxes looked too girly for my sophisticated aunt. My questions were answered in seconds when I saw Ify in the living room with my mum and Toks (I can’t even call her my sister, so evil).

Apparently, Toks told my mum Ify’s story and my mum decided against her better judgement to do something about it. Since Ify’s dad didn’t want her, by default I had a new and improved Toks living in my house. Ify then looked up at me and smiled, and I could swear I saw fangs instead of teeth.

Ify mentioned that my mum’s kindness and support was a miracle, and a plan ordained by God, I don’t quite agree. It might be a miracle for her, but I’m sure it’s a nightmare for me. I said nothing and climbed up the stairs weakly, my life was about to turn upside down. Funny how I was the only one who could see it coming, sadly, the strength to control the outcome evaded me. Why me!

Ashake’s Diary 2 – Operation Break Simi and DJ Up

Ashake's diary

So I got into a lot of trouble with Miss Ade last week. I was smart enough not to cross her path over the past few days. But that was by far the least of my problems. DJ (Deji) my crush for the past two months just asked Simi, my classmate to be his girlfriend ” like hell, if I let this happen.” My aim presently was to break them up. All I needed was the perfect plan.

I mean, I surely am attractive, so I’ve been told. Simi was short and chubby, far from cute. She had nothing on me. My plan A was to kill Simi and hide her body (He he !! Dumb). Plan b was to turn the two of them against each other, this by far was a better plan.

So the next day I went to school with high hopes, my plan was in motion. I borrowed Simi’s phone from her locker that morning for a few minutes when she left class and texted DJ, saying that ” I (not Simi) didn’t think anything could work out between us.” DJ obviously walked into class that morning looking distraught, and as a nice girl, I gave him a shoulder to cry on.


In case you missed.

Ashake’s Diary 1 – Trouble With Miss Ade


DJ poured his heart out, (obviously thinking I cared), I simply told him to forget her, and move on. Simi entered the class looking confused. She tried to talk to DJ, but he walked out on her. Lucky for us, our teacher turned in sick again, so we were free that morning. Simi came to me as well, asking for advice; I obviously told her point blank, that DJ did not like her, telling her I was sure he was out to use her. Simi took my word for it and accepted fate.

Unfortunately for me, Ify (Amebo of the class) saw me take Simi’s phone that morning (I still don’t know how). All I know is that the whole class had a field day calling me names. And I had to endure Simi and DJ throwing angry stares at me all day. I left class immediately I heard the sound of the closing bell.

When I got home, my lousy sister, Toks (Tokunbo) who heard my escapade in school didn’t waste any time telling everyone at home. I had to endure a long talk from my mum and dad about life and the choices we make. After that, I made up my mind never to play smart. DJ wasn’t my only crush anyway. I still had Steven (a senior in my school). With a smile on my face, I knew Plan C was in motion.


Yejide Erogbogbo